Food for thought....A newbie's perspective

Hello!

First let me say “Thank You!” to everyone on this board that has been kind enough to follow my journey over the past couple of weeks. It is truly appreciated.

With that said, I have some thoughts as a ‘newbie’ here, in response to some of the conversations that I have been following. These are not conversations I have participated in; I’ve just been passive reader. However, as a newbie, reading some of the responses to requests for help from other newbies, I was feeling super stressed and I wasn’t even the one asking for help!!

In the past two days, in two separate conversations, I’ve witnessed some ‘in-fighting’ amongst some of the veterans here (I’m presuming they are veterans, perhaps incorrectly). It’s gotten a bit ‘catty’, pardon the pun! As a new person asking for help, it’s not really helpful when the conversation digresses into squabbling between the responders. It just seems like responding to a new person’s request for help is not really the place to hash out philosophical differences.

It’s already overwhelming enough to deal with the diagnosis, contemplate the impact on your life and your kitty’s life, attempt to absorb the bucket-loads of information, and actually DO what needs to be done. I don’t have to tell you that, you were once in our shoes. The conflict just adds to the confusion. There must be a way to convey the information without bickering and getting personal. I can only imagine that the person asking for help might be second guessing themselves and saying, “Hmmm…who do I trust here…which advice do I follow…who is right?” Plus, the person’s request for help gets lost in the mix, because the next 15 posts are about who’s right and who’s wrong and not the problem at hand…

Again, for those of you who have been supporting me, this has not been my experience. But, I was moved enough by what I read to post this note. Like I said, I wasn’t the one asking for help and it was stressful for me to witness the conflict. I can’t imagine how much more stressful it would have been if it had been my request that was the forum for the argument.

I hope that my post doesn’t offend anyone; that is not at all my intention. This forum is extremely valuable, and those of us who are new are so very lucky to be able to come here and get the help that is desperately needed. I just wanted to share my perspective….

Best wishes to you and your kitties!!

S

 

Hi Rebecca-

Thanks for your response. I was (am) extremely nervous about post this note, but felt strongly enough to go ahead and do it. My note is not meant to point fingers or judge, I just wanted to give an outsider's perspective. Sometimes words are said, feelings are hurt, and the whole thing escalates, losing sight of the most important thing....a kitty that needs help. Hopefully my thoughts will be received as intended, a reminder of when each person here was new, and how stressful those days, weeks, months were.

I'm certain that the best of intentions is what brings people here to help. I am grateful for the help I have received and grateful that this place exists. Thank you all for that!

Happy Friday and have a wonderful weekend!!

s

 

Thanks for your post. It is good to hear from newbies about our responses. I now we are indeed all trying to help. One of the biggest problems is that it is all done in writing - and it is so hard to decipher nuances. Sometimes a post that seems very abrupt would not come off that way if it was said in person.

But thanks for the reminder. We all need to be kind to each other - newbies and old guys.....

 

Thank you for your post Sherry. I hope everyone gets the chance to read it.

Jeanne

 

Great post!