Caryl & Sebastian & Alex (GA)
Member Since 2009
yesterday
Morning Everyone!
I don't work today...YAY!
I also feel very strange and sad today but at the same time very blessed and lucky. I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes and I honestly don't know why because I don't FEEL like crying but I sort of am. 8 months ago today I lost my Alex. My first sugar baby and one of the two true loves of my life. (My dad also passed on the 2nd of a month so that day never escapes me). I don't sit and dwell on this but as I was watching Jake, Dylan and Sebastian eat their breffis I thought that Alex would be happy
He wasn't so happy when I brought Dylan in but I had no idea what I was doing and really no idea why and it didn't work. When I brought Jake in it was for Dylan so that she would leave Alex alone (and well I did fall for him..he was tiny sick scrawny and adorable)...THAT did work. Then Alex left me a month and a half later and my heart did too for a while. It became clearer to me why I was in a hurry to bring those two in. Self preservation. I don't know how many times I said 'when Alex and Jackson go, I have no reason to live", and Jackson had left me 6 months earlier. Alex had so many things wrong with him and he was 16...it was only a matter of time 
Jake and Dylan got along great from the minute I introduced them and that was that. They were brother and sister immediately. Fast forward 6 months later to December and my heart was healed enough to start reading about cats in need again. I NEVER EVER meant to adopt one. When I read about Sebastian my heart just melted. I had read about him before and I was sick for him..especially since he had gone OTJ but I couldn't bring him in with A&J. But this past December, well...it was a heart decision. I got a few "what if it doesn't work out's"? and I just said "It has to".
And it has. So easily it's almost unbelievable. That is why I think that Alex is happy. I adopted Sebastian thinking he was OTJ ...but he wasn't. Maybe Alex knew and gave me that push. He knew I took great care of him and that maybe I should help someone else. And when I look at them all, a family, all blended so easily together; eating together, sleeping together and playing together with all of the years between them...all three of them misfits (Dylan spent her first 8 months in a vet's office, Jake was rescued from a hoarder house with 80 cats and Sebastian sent to a kill shelter by his mom of 10 years then fostered for 3.5 with no one really interested in permanently adopting him), I can't help but think that Alex is smiling down on me and touching his paw to my face and thinking "you did good, Mommy".
Sebastian ate a great breffis and when I woke up he was wrestling with Jake! All p's A-OK
Have a great day everyone. Enjoy whatever Bowl you watch and prayers and vines to those who need them
xo
Caryl, Sebastian, Jake & Dylan (and Alex & Jackson too)
Morning Everyone!
I don't work today...YAY!
I also feel very strange and sad today but at the same time very blessed and lucky. I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes and I honestly don't know why because I don't FEEL like crying but I sort of am. 8 months ago today I lost my Alex. My first sugar baby and one of the two true loves of my life. (My dad also passed on the 2nd of a month so that day never escapes me). I don't sit and dwell on this but as I was watching Jake, Dylan and Sebastian eat their breffis I thought that Alex would be happy
He wasn't so happy when I brought Dylan in but I had no idea what I was doing and really no idea why and it didn't work. When I brought Jake in it was for Dylan so that she would leave Alex alone (and well I did fall for him..he was tiny sick scrawny and adorable)...THAT did work. Then Alex left me a month and a half later and my heart did too for a while. It became clearer to me why I was in a hurry to bring those two in. Self preservation. I don't know how many times I said 'when Alex and Jackson go, I have no reason to live", and Jackson had left me 6 months earlier. Alex had so many things wrong with him and he was 16...it was only a matter of time Jake and Dylan got along great from the minute I introduced them and that was that. They were brother and sister immediately. Fast forward 6 months later to December and my heart was healed enough to start reading about cats in need again. I NEVER EVER meant to adopt one. When I read about Sebastian my heart just melted. I had read about him before and I was sick for him..especially since he had gone OTJ but I couldn't bring him in with A&J. But this past December, well...it was a heart decision. I got a few "what if it doesn't work out's"? and I just said "It has to".
And it has. So easily it's almost unbelievable. That is why I think that Alex is happy. I adopted Sebastian thinking he was OTJ ...but he wasn't. Maybe Alex knew and gave me that push. He knew I took great care of him and that maybe I should help someone else. And when I look at them all, a family, all blended so easily together; eating together, sleeping together and playing together with all of the years between them...all three of them misfits (Dylan spent her first 8 months in a vet's office, Jake was rescued from a hoarder house with 80 cats and Sebastian sent to a kill shelter by his mom of 10 years then fostered for 3.5 with no one really interested in permanently adopting him), I can't help but think that Alex is smiling down on me and touching his paw to my face and thinking "you did good, Mommy".
Sebastian ate a great breffis and when I woke up he was wrestling with Jake! All p's A-OK
Have a great day everyone. Enjoy whatever Bowl you watch and prayers and vines to those who need them
xo
Caryl, Sebastian, Jake & Dylan (and Alex & Jackson too)
