anyone know a better poison control hotline?

I've had this fridge magnet forever. NSAL, 888-232-8870. Now that it's cleaning day I should replace it. The one time I really needed it I was put on hold by the computer and then listened to a long spiel about volunteer blah blah, PLEASE HAVE YOUR CREDIT CARD READY for a one time donation. If it's a donation shouldn't that be an optional thing? If I remember correctly it was $100 and another password to remember. I ended up calling my pharmacy and got better advice a lot quicker.
That was Fat-Head Lewis pulling a teabag out of the trash, the sleepy tea with catnip in it.

 

I know right. I called 3 hot lines once because I gave a double dose of heart meds to Smokey. Each one started with a long recorded message and each one wanted me to enter charge card info BEFORE speaking to a human (are there any humans anymore). The vet ER wouldn't even help they said call poison control. Just horrible. Is this want people have to go through if it's a baby or child?

 

That's awful. I won't even go into what it's like calling 911 here. You want to know "How do you spell that name" before I describe what shade of blue the baby is? The only bright side is our dog getting into a roll of Tums. Again I called the pharmacy. She had Play-Doh poo for a day.
Why don't they assume first you know what you're talking about.
I also have a better idea for calling the local police when it's not 911 because here you have to drag out a phone book. Why not make 811 a number that connects you to the nearest police station. The cops here think it's a great idea but the number's already in use for something stupid.
And now...